Amelia Earhart Thinks Kim Kardashian is Just Full of S**t !

As a woman who navigated by stars, wind currents, and dead reckoning, I know a thing or two about surviving turbulent weather. I have had my share of forced landings, but I never once packaged my engine failures into a canned carbonated beverage. Yet here we are in 2026, watching Kim Kardashian turn her failure to pass the California bar exam into a viral advertisement for her new energy drink, "Update". In the ad, she smugly tells legal legend Gloria Allred, "I didn’t pass the bar. I raised it."

Let us analyze this altitude-defying logic. To "raise" a bar generally implies clearing a height no one else could reach, not walking underneath it and claiming you redefined gravity. But in the modern theater of influencer feminism, the genuine work of a profession is merely a backdrop for lifestyle branding. Kim’s drink is powered by paraxanthine—which is literally the compound your liver makes when it digests caffeine. It is pre-digested pep, which perfectly mirrors a campaign where academic failure is pre-digested into a triumph. In the commercial, she sits inside a glass display case in an art gallery, pretending to look busy while nannies and housekeepers off-screen keep her empire aloft. To bring on Gloria Allred, a legal pioneer who has spent decades in court fighting for women, to validate a failed test as a marketing stunt is the ultimate nose-dive for feminist progress. True elevation for women does not look like skipping the Bar exam to play a fictional divorce attorney on a television drama. It looks like the unglamorous, grueling hours of study, practice, and genuine labor. In my era, if my engine failed over the Atlantic, I couldn't just rebrand the descent as a daring new deep-sea exploration initiative to sell premium life vests. You either fly the plane or you don't.

The flight path forward for women is simple: we must stop treating wealthy aesthetic pivots as social victories. If we want our daughters to conquer the skies or the courtrooms, we must teach them that true achievement cannot be purchased in a can at Walmart. We must celebrate the women who sweat in the library and the hangar, not the ones who rent the spotlight to mock the very standards they couldn't meet. To raise the bar, you must have the grit to clear it.